Leaving on a Jetplane...

The blog will be on hiatus next week. I am traveling to Indianapolis for Zeta Tau Alpha's National Leadership Conference. I am leaving the kids in the capable hands of my parents and sister. You should pray for them.

 I deeply appreciate their willingness to take on all three kids while I am out of town. Chrissy originally volunteered to keep Maggie and April was going to keep the boys. But then, April was summoned for jury duty (of course!). Hope offered to keep the boys but I was worried Will might get homesick. Then Chrissy thought she could handle all three kids by herself. Ha. Ha. Ha. She is brave. To go from no kids to 3 kids is like deciding to jump out of a plane without a parachute. I knew she would need backup so Mom and Dad volunteered. Bless them. At least they have done this before.

Of course, I am going to miss them terribly but I know they will have a wonderful time while they are in the Lowcountry. Even though I won't get back from Indy until Sunday evening, their Dad is going to get the kids on Friday night. I don't want to push my luck with my family and honestly, too much of a good thing can be dangerous, right? Mom, Dad and Chrissy will at least need the weekend to recover.

So Chrissy, good luck. This will be the best birth control you will ever need. I promise. And just remember, this is a snapshot of what your life would be like if Josh and I meet an untimely demise. Let me know when I get back if I need to look for another guardian. (Hee Hee!)

Have a great week everyone!

Booty licking and other funnies...

I haven't had a Friday night alone in a long time. I enjoyed a pedicure and a little shopping while Josh took the kids to his parents for a visit. Once I got home and the house was empty, I really didn't like being alone anymore. Those little people who never give me a minute's privacy, provide my life with a whole lot of excitement--so much so that when they aren't around, an empty house seems boring. Here are some funny and embarrassing stories from the week:

Will: I want to drive a motorcycle. Me: No way. They are too dangerous. Will: I know. That's what makes them awesome!

Will thinks he is Howie Mandel. He watches him on America's Got Talent and has started to mimic his fist bumps and the way he votes on the show. Every time I ask him a question he will respond with, "I think I'll say yes." Or "It's a Yes for me." Or "I'm gonna say No." Just what I need around here, a germaphobic comedian..

Will: Mom, I want some Cheetos. Me: Ask Daddy. I am grading papers. Will: Daddy said "no." That's why you have to change the answer to "yes."

Our neighbor Russ is poking fun at Ian while he rides his scooter. Ian: You are really starting to piss me off. Me: WHAT did you say? Ian: The "P" word. Me: Why did you say that? Ian: Mom, it's just an expression. Me: I am aware that it is an expression but you know better. Why did you say it? Ian: Because I couldn't think of a better word to use.

I always want my kids to be compassionate and empathetic towards others. Even though we talk a lot about it, sometimes, it takes an actual moment to better teach a lesson. Usually, those teaching moments are very embarrassing for me. Like when Ian was 5 and we were in Target. He saw a little person and asked them if he was like the Oompa Loompas from the Chocolate Factory. My face was more red than the shade they use at Target. Anyway, this week, I took Will to Kohl's. When we went to check out, we saw a woman with down syndrome. As the great niece and cousin of two wonderful men with down syndrome, I try to emphasize their similarities to us rather than their differences. Will, of course, was more interested in the latter. He said while pointing, "Mom, why does that lady look like that." I get right on his level and say, "Will, Honey, she has down syndrome. God made her that way. Even though she looks different, she is a special person just like me and you. Please don't point at people. We treat every one the way that we want to be treated, even if they look different than us." He thinks about that for a few seconds and says, "Why does she have a fat booty?" I could feel the color hit my face. "Will, that is just part of the way that God made her." He thinks a little more, "I get that she has syndrome but why did God make her with a fat booty?" God bless her, she turned around and said, "I wonder that all the time myself!"

Will put himself in Time Out after he accidentally knocked Maggie over. He was upset that he might have hurt her. For all of his deviousness, he loves his Princess. When I went to let him know she was OK, he said, "Why do you always gotta be bothering me? I am in my quiet spot." Maybe I should keep him there all day.

Maggie is in the early stages of potty training. She has pretty much stopped wearing diapers around the house and opts for training panties. She is also very interested in running from you as soon as you take her clothes off and instead likes to streak through the house naked, laughing at the top of her lungs. If you chase behind her, the game is even more fantastic. So this morning, she is streaking through the house and I hear Ian yell, "Ewwww, Will. Don't lick Maggie on the butt cheek." Will, who is laughing so hard he can barely breathe, says, "I thought about biting her but licking her was waaaaay more funny." Poor Mags.

Explaining the Why's

If you have older kids, you under stand the Why stage. If you haven't hit it yet, get ready. It is honestly my least favorite stage (I know adolescence will make the Why stage seem like fairyland). Ian hit the Whys at around 4.5 or 5. Will is there, in full throttle.

He asks me about everything. Why does Daddy have 2 trucks? Why does Maggie not have a wee-wee? Why is Molly called a chocolate lab instead of a brown lab? Why is your belly fat? Why do crayons smell funny? Why do you wash the dishes like that? Why are your eyes green and mine are blue? Why do you shave your legs? Why do you like Diet Coke so much? Why is God in heaven? Why does Daddy have to go to work? The list can go on and on and on.

The hard part about the Why stage is that an answer, truthful or not, really doesn't satisfy the question. You guessed it, it leads to another question. It boils down to curiosity and I am so grateful that he is so curious about everything. Really. I am.

Sometimes, it is hard to find honest answers to questions without saying too much, too soon (Remember TAMPAX?) or even having an answer at all. This week, Will has had a lot of questions about subjects I really don't want to talk about--Casey Anthony--mostly because Ian has asked me a lot about it. How do you explain to a child why a mother would hurt her own child? That is unexplainable even to me. And then today, we were driving home when we witnessed a train collide with a truck that tried to outrun the crossing rails. (The driver was able to escape unharmed). Will was pretty traumatized from seeing it happen. I was too. For me personally, it brought back memories of an awful tragedy of my sister's friend Casey Heisenbuttle, who died after her truck collided with a train. She was just 15. Will kept asking me why the accident happened? I didn't have an answer to satisfy him.

After the train incident today, I read a blog entry from one of my favorite bloggers Angie Smith (if you have never read Angie's blog, Bring the Rain, you should. Reading the story about the diagnosis in vitro and loss of her daughter Audrey will change your life. I really mean that). The recent post was about always wanting to know the why without remembering the Who. She suggests that we always want to know why things happen the way they do without really remembering Who is in control of those events. God of course. And in the end, the Who is all that matters. Today, her post brought me a lot of comfort. Not just from the emotional memories of Casey, but comfort in knowing that I don't really have to know all of the answers to the Why questions. A lot of answers to the why questions are "Because God made them that way." In other moments, when I don't know the answer, I just pray for guidance.

In parenting, I think it is important to admit that we don't know all the answers. Giving "I don't know " as the response to "Why little boys can't fly" or "Why fireworks smell so bad" will help condition them (and you) for the future. It will be the go to response you need when they ask "Why are you so mean?" and Why do you want to ruin my life?" or "Why can't I stay out until 4 in the morning?" Maybe this Why stage isn't so bad afterall.

The Waffle House

My kids think they live at Waffle House, where they can order anything they want off of the menu at any time of the day they please. And to make matters worse, all three of my kids LOVE to eat. "EAT, EAAATTT, EAAATTT MOOOORE" is Maggie's favorite saying, in fact. Just trying to keep up with the dishes that come with their orders is a full time job. And honestly, I know I am blessed to have 3 children that love food. I have plenty of friends that aren't so lucky. As the daughter of a farmer, we always have plenty of food around but I often wonder that if they eat this much now, how am I ever going to be able to afford to feed them?

On most days, I cook three different breakfasts at three different times, according to when they wake up. Ian is (and has always been) an early riser. Sometimes, he is up at 5:30am. Ugh. And he wants to eat as soon as his feet hit the floor. This morning, he wanted cereal. That is not hard to manage. Then Maggie woke up and she wanted a banana, oatmeal, and some jelly toast. Done. Will woke up shortly after but he is more of a brunch kid. So when I started his breakfast at 9:30, Ian and Maggie were hungry again since they had been up a while. I made blueberry pancakes for all of them. It seemed like as soon as I got the kitchen cleaned up, they were ready for lunch. Cole was here so that meant another order to take. In all, I made 3 ham sandwiches, 4 hotdogs, supplied 3 kids with sun chips, one with cheetos, Maggie ate some watermelon, Cole ate grape tomatoes, and I made myself a salad. PHEW!

Not even an hour later, Will comes to me begging for a snack. Over time, I have learned this is often a ploy for junk and not really because he is hungry. I offered fruit or veggies as an option and suddenly, he wasn't ready for a snack afterall. But an hour later, he really was. They ate some fruit, some tomatoes, and some wheat thins. And hour after that, I discovered that Will busted the child lock off of the "junk" cabinet and provided nutty bars and oatmeal creme pies to himself, Ian and Cole while I was rocking Maggie. The empty wrappers and busted lock were the only evidence.

By 5:30, all three boys were claiming they were "starving" and needed supper. I served spaghetti at 6:00. Will ate a salad with his meal. Ian ate three helpings of supper while Cole and Will each had 2 plates. Where do they put it? I mean, they are all active kids. Other than a few cartoons in the morning over breakfast and reading time during the day, they are outside playing. I realize that burns a lot of calories but really, that much? And I admit, I am completely jealous of their metabolism. I can't even dream of eating like they do. But their healthy appetites do worry me. They are all skinny now but bad habits start early and I worry that they will always think they can eat like this. They won't. Every time I bring it up with the pediatrician (every 3 months when I go to Maggie's well-check), she assures me to be grateful that they eat well. "Kimberly, no one EVER complains to me that their kids eat too much." And that might be true. However, she isn't playing waitress of a 24 hour diner with three little people that NEVER leave a tip!

Watermelon!

I told you I could eat this whole slushy!

Yummy Pizza!

The Importance of Being Honest...

Have you ever been lied to? It hurts, right? When your 3 year old is the one doing the lying, I think it hurts a little more. How could I raise a child capable of such twisted tales? How could he figure out to be deceptive at such a young age? He is, afterall, only 3. But then I remember, this is Will we are talking about.

Will and Ian came inside from playing in the backyard. After 5 minutes, they were "dying." Ian asked me to read with him. Will retreated to the playroom. Maggie was closely behind. As Ian and I were reading, I noticed that Will and Maggie were quiet---too quiet. I called to him and asked what he was doing. "Playing with trucks" came the response. I then heard a couple of trucks knock together. I went back to reading with Ian. A few minutes later, Will came to the kitchen and grabbed the baby wipes off the counter. I inquired as to why he needed wipes. He responded, "Maggie needs me to wipe her shirt." I asked him to put the wipes back on the counter, fearing that he would pull them all out of the container. I assumed he was actually cleaning his monster trucks. If only that were the case.

When Will returned the wipes to the counter, I noticed he was doing it quickly and trying to stay out of my sight. Obviously, knowing him like I do, I knew something was up. I went to him and noticed that he had something on his hands--it looked like marker but he had done a pretty good job wiping it off with the baby wipes. On closer inspection, I realized he smelled like paint. Maggie walked in from the playroom and I realized she had played his canvas. My reaction was to ask "Will, why on Earth did you paint your sister?" He shrugged his shoulders and said, "Maggie told me to." Now, Maggie is very bright and she knows a lot of words. "Bubba, please paint me" is not among them.

I took Maggie to the bathroom and got her cleaned off (before thinking to take a picture). I then went to the playroom to discover that Will used my ironing board to climb up on the counter, and get into the cabinet where I keep all of the paints. In his defense, he did use a piece of paper as a palette for all of his paint selections and a brush to complete his artistic creation on his sister. The mess was actually minimal. I was not shocked or suprised at his level of mischief. Afterall, this is Will. I was however, very taken aback by his lies and his willingness to deceive me. That is not Will's style. He is not ashamed to tell me that he is bad. Normally, he would present his Masterpiece Maggie to me, proud of his genuis. Not today. He didn't even try to use John Payton as a scapegoat.

After everyone was clean, I sat Will down on the couch to ask him why he felt the need to lie to me about what he had done. "I can't spell the words" was his response. When I told him he could tell me, he simply remained silent. I then went on to tell him that being honest was the most important thing he could ever be, it was the most important virtue he could ever have. I gave him the lecture on The Boy Who Cried Wolf and added our house rule that if you lie, you get in twice as much trouble as if you are honest about your indiscretion. No reaction. So then, I pulled out the big guns. "Will, I am extremely disappointed in you for lying to me and for painting your sister."  And there came the waterworks. I told him I loved him but I was disappointed and he was going to room. Miserable wails came from his room. "I waaaant myyyyy Maggie Moo...I want my Maggie" came in between sobs. After 10 minutes, I went in there to reinterate the lesson and he immediately cleared his tears, as if on cue. We talked about the dangers of lying and then I told him he had to stay in his room for 20 more minutes. He ended up staying for 2 hours because all of that art made him tired and he needed a nap.

When I returned from Will's room after the lecture, Ian said, "Watching you punish Will was painful. It made me want to cry. I mean, he deserved it, but it sure was tough to see that." I said, "Ian, it was a lot harder for me to punish him. I don't like having to be mean but my job is to teach you right from wrong." Ian said, "I know and lying is bad. Someone should have taught Casey Anthony about being honest." And he is right. We probably don't honor honesty as much as we should anymore. Lying has become commonplace in a lot of areas in our society. However, it won't be tolerated as a norm in the Burgess house. I think if we strive to do anything, the least that we can do is be honest--Whether it is testifying before a jury or telling our Mom that we just painted our baby sister. There is a lot of importance in being honest. 

Celebrating America's Birthday

We have had a wonderful weekend full of lots of food, friends and family celebrating America's birthday! The kids have played in the water and witnessed plenty of fireworks---and the best part is that we still have another round of fun and fireworks tomorrow! That is why I love summer. Tonight, we grilled steaks with our neighbors across the street (who were kind enough to let us tag along to their celebration yesterday in Williamston). After supper, the kids played out on the slip-n-slide. (See video http://www.facebook.com/#!/video/video.php?v=518771417781&comments) When it was getting dark, Will and I went down the street to get his "sweet girlfriend" Madi to watch the fireworks show presented to us by Josh and Russ.
We put a blanket out for all the kids and they were chatting, laughing and chasing fireflies until the show started. Russ or Josh would come over and whisper the name of the firework to one of the kids, "Butterflies and flowers" or "Southern Dreams" or "Jade Showers," and that child would stand up and announce the name of the display to the entire crowd. Everyone would cheer with delight when the fuse was lit. Josh and Russ would get either a standing ovation or a loud clammer of "Boo's" depending on the vitality and color that the fireworks would emit. In the end, the crowd was satisfied with the presentation.

Maggie loves fireworks. She would squeal, clap and shake with excitement each time they would light up. It was so fun to watch her. And honestly, she has been so fun to watch all weekend---The way she devoured watermelon, slid down the slide at the pool, and watched the big fireworks display in Williamston last night was just pure fun. My favorite part of parenting is to live through the eyes of my children. To get small glimpses into how they see the world. Their perspectives always check my own. And from my perch tonight, I couldn't help but notice the American flag in my yard. There is no way I could explain to my kids how very blessed we are to live in America. For all the things that are wrong with our government, there is something so spectaculary wonderful that we live in a country that provides us with so many freedoms. Like the freedom to share such an incredible weekend like this with my family.

Check out all of our pictures from this weekend on my Facebook page in the album labeled "Sweet Summa."
And above all else, remember during all of the fun of this weekend to pray for all of our troops who sacrifice so much for our freedom. Happy 235th Birthday, America! May you stand forever as a beacon of freedom and liberty---and may we always know that what unites us is far more remarkable than what divides us. God Bless America!

Getting Punked and Other Funnies...

The kids say and do funny things all day long so it is sometimes hard for me to capture their entire humor on the blog. Below is a compilation of some of the funny conversations we have had and funny things they did this week...

--I have been trying to teach Will another blessing besides his constant, "God made me, Amen." So I have been singing "Oh the Lord is good to me and so I thank the Lord, for giving me the things I need, like the sun and the rain and the apple seeds, Oh the Lord is good to me, Amen!" However, after "like" I have a bad habit of changing the words, to things like "lysol, clorox, and Mr. Clean" or "Ian, William, and Maggie" or "corn, potatoes and broccoli", etc. This morning, Will was singing along with me and when I got to "like" he said, "Mom, how do you ever expect me to learn this blessing if you keep changing the words? And you wonder why I only say one prayer. God Made Me, AMEN!"

--Driving down the road, I tell Ian about a friend who had her baby. Will asks if I was having another baby. Me: Would you like me to have another baby? Will: Yes. I want you to have a bunch, a bunch, a bunch of babies. Ian: Um...NO. N-O spells NO. No more babies. 3 is enough! Will: No I want more babies. I love babies! Me: Would you want a boy or girl baby? Will: A boy baby. I already have a girl baby. Me: What would you name the baby? Will: City Gorilla. Ian: Exactly why WE aren't having any more babies! (And just FYI, we aren't planning to add any more babies!)

--At the store, a man stops us and says, "Where on Earth did you get that pretty baby?" Will (looking at the man like he was silly for having to ask the question): From God. She is our princess. Ain't she a cute priss? The man replies, "Yes. And you are pretty cute yourself." Will says, "Yep. I'm a handful."

--I go out to the storage shed to look for something. I am not gone even 3 minutes. When I come in, Will is standing on the kitchen table, wearing his underwear and a Santa Hat and carrying a play chainsaw. He is screaming, "Ho, Ho, Ho...Bad Santa, coming for you..." Maggie is squealing with delight and saying, "Ho, Ho, Ho!" When I left the house, Will was fully clothed and looking at a book.

-- I open the cabinet in the kitchen and all of the tupperware topples over onto my head. Ian jumps out from behind the chair and says, "You just got PUNKED!" Who gave him access to MTV? When he sees I am not laughing, he says, "Mom do you even know what it means to get punked?" "Why yes Ian, I do. I am just wondering how you know?" With a large smile he responds, "'Cause I am a genius!"

--Will: Mom, did you know that Maggie doesn't have a wee-wee? Me: Yes, Will. Girls don't have wee-wees. Will: Why not? Me: Because God made them that way. Will: Well, I am not sure why God thought a tootie (his word, not mine) was a good idea for a girl. Me: What do you mean? Will: Well, Mom, how is Maggie ever gonna learn to pee-pee in the yard if she has a tootie? She doesn't have anything to stick out. Me: I don't think Maggie will want to pee pee in the yard. Girls don't do that. Will: Well she is going to be missing out because when you have a wee wee, you can pee in a bottle...in a jar...in the yard..out the window...through the deck.. Ian: Yep, the possibilities are endless. Me: I think she will be OK. Will: I don't think she will. So, so sad.