Goodbye to Mimi....

I want my kids to think I am cool. Not their friend. Just cool. On Friday, Will thought I was. "Mom, you are such a rockstar!" What had I done to garner such praise? I had 5 kids (3 of them in carseats!) and a kid-size 4 wheeler stuffed in the minivan--which I loaded in the carpool line at school. Oh yeah, I am a rockstar. Of course, my status didn't last long. To Maggie right now, I am anything but cool.

On Saturday night during the Clemson game our neighbor, Russ, somehow convinced Maggie to throw her pacifier, Mimi (yes the Pacifier had a name like she was a real, live person), in the trash. Maggie, attempting to be a big girl and impress everyone, threw Mimi in the trash. Because she was so brave (and it was she who did it and not me), I seized on the opportunity to kick the paci habit. She is, afterall, 18 months old and absolutely obsessed with it. That of course, sounded like a bright idea at the time. 3 days later, I am pretty sure the person who was the most tortured in this experience was me.

Saturday night she did okay going to sleep without it. She was very tired and feel asleep on the couch. Sunday morning she did okay until time to leave for church. She always has it in the car and on the drive to church, she reminded me every second of the 4 mile trek that Mimi was missing. After church wasn't much better. She actually lay in the floor and begged me for it. She went to my closet and searched in every pair of shoes on the off chance that she had hid one inside a shoe. At church on Sunday night, I warned her teacher that there was a very good chance that she might tackle a classmate in an attempt to steal their paci. Luckily, she didn't stoop to such a desperate low.

Sunday night, there was very little sleep gotten by me. She fought sleep and then woke up 4 times during the night begging me for it. In an attempt to console her, I rubbed her back. Instead of lulling back to sleep, she grabbed my hand and screamed, "Dop (stop) It! Dop It! No touch me!" Heartwrenching. I wanted to give it back to her. Really I did. In fact, what little bit of sleep I got, was done with Mimi in my hand, tucked under the pillow. It took all of my mighty will power to stop the urge to give in. But I kept thinking, "We have come so far. Tomorrow will be better."

Mags attacking Will. I did break up the fight,
 after a picture of course!

Well, it wasn't. Will was sick and Maggie was in full longing for her Mimi. She cried the entire drive to school and the entire way back. I thought seruiously about driving her to Charleston and leaving her with my mom. Afterall, she was the one who gave her the pacifier to begin with. She should have to at least suffer with me.

Instead of asking me for Mimi, she began asking for her "paci," as if to make it clear to me that Mimi was the paci and was not to be confused with something else. She cried for 45 minutes straight at nap time, and then the entire way to school, sitting in the car line, and all the way back home yesterday afternoon. She even attacked Will, who kept trying to console her and tell her she would be OK without her Mimi. Poor Will felt so sorry for her that he petitioned me six times on her behalf. When I wouldn't give in, he asked God to intervene during prayer time. "God, please make Mommy give Maggie back her Mimi. If she won't do it, make Maggie feel better about missing it." So sweet but God did not intervene to give back Mimi. However, perhaps He did intervene to make her feel better about missing it. She slept all night and didn't ask me for it this morning. We seem to be over the worst of it. At least, I hope so.

These are the milestones that are hard. The ones that hurt. And honestly, it hurts a lot to think she is too old to have Mimi anymore. It hurts to know that she is in the midst of potty-training and soon diapers won't be a reality in my life anymore. (OK, so I am not all that upset about that one. Just the part that she is big enough to wear big girl panties.) It hurts to know that my baby years are coming to a close. It seems like just yesterday, Ian was a little toddler who loved for me to rock him to sleep. Now, I can no longer pick him up. It hurts to know that time goes so fast. But it does.

So, goodbye Mimi. You were a good pacifier and you gave me a lot of peaceful quiet. There is no one who will miss you as much as me. And even though I am not cool for throwing you in the trash, I know the time has come. Peace Out.

Catching up...

Sorry for taking so long to get back to the blog. We have been SO busy!

My mom was here last week. It was so great for her to be here. She spoiled the children immensely---took them to McDonald's to get breakfast before school, let them eat ice cream, bought them a ton of clothes, and read them story after story. I know it's what grandma's are supposed to do but it is amazing to see how much my children have transformed the woman who raised me. Not at all the same person.

Our Saturday's have been spent watching football---Clemson football. Since they have started out 6-0, we have been glued to their performance on Saturday's. Our neighbors, Russ & Kim, come over with their children/friends, April & Cole come over, and we cheer on the Tigers with lots of good food and fun. The kids play and we watch the game. That food, friendship, and WINNING, has made it a great fall!

Sunday we went to my in-laws for lunch after church. I got to visit with my sweet nephews Silas and Eli. We got to go for a walk to see the leaves changing and then drove up the top of Skyuka Mountain in NC to see the leaves. Another week or so and the leaves are going to be perfect!

The children are doing great. Ian is doing extremely well in school. Mostly A's and a few B's. This week, we have been doing a report on black widow spiders and building a model of a spider. Ian loves science and history so it has been a lot of fun doing projects and reading with him.

Will has managed to stay on green every single day since school started. We all know how big of a deal that is! We have been singing the 5 little pumpkins song over and over every day. He is also spending a lot of time drawing. I like that a lot more than flipping upside down off the couch!

Maggie is in the midst of potty training and she is breezing through. It is hard to believe she is old enough to be in this stage. She is learning her animal sounds and loves to read.

Thanks for being patient while I took time to catch my breath!

The Ladies Man....

Will is many things---smart, affectionate, stubborn, independent, stubborn, witty, stubborn---and now apparently, quite the ladies man. Of course, he dotes over Maggie like she hung the moon, but how his attitude persisted outside of our home was somewhat a mystery to me. He adores his "girlfriend" Madi but I know after spending too much time together, he will say she "gets on my nerves" or "she is aggravating me." This probably has less to do with Madi and more with Will being stubborn as a mule.

His teacher told me yesterday that "all of the little girls" in Will's class love him. This infatuation is apparently more than just adoring Will from afar. In fact, their love for him is creating quite a stir in the classroom. Mr. Casanova is so popular that the girls are arguing over who gets to sit with him at snack, who gets to be in centers with him, stand next to him in line and play with him on the playground. I have had  several of the other moms tell me that their daughters "just love Will" and are always talking about him at home. When I was dropping him off the other day, a girl was literally wrapped around her mother's leg, begging not to go into class. In the midst of her meltdown, she saw Will walking into class and like a switch, she immediately stopped crying, let go of her mom and followed him. Wow.

I was curious about Will's reaction to this popularity. His teacher said that in some ways, he probably encouraged them because he is "so sweet and kind" to everyone. And yes, I did clarify that she was talking about my child. She reported that he helps the girls on the slide, talks with them and plays with them. But she said she can tell that he gets aggravated with their desire to spend so much time with him. He is, after all, a total boy's boy. I imagine his tolerance for tea parties, dress up and playing house is pretty limited.

This morning, on the way to school, I asked him about the girls in his class and if they liked him. Will: Yes they do. Me: Why do you think they like you so much? Will (looking at me with a very matter of fact face): Well...you know, I'm kind of a big deal. Me (Spitting Diet Coke into my windshield): WHAT? Will: I mean, I'm a good lookin' guy. And I'm fun. I know why they like me. Me: Well maybe its less about how you look and more because you are nice to them. Will: Yeah. I mean I'm nice. They're all pretty. It works for us.

WHAT? If this is 3, I can't imagine what happens when he hits puberty--probably a big heaping pile of trouble.

I guess the bright side is that he is making friends and his teacher thinks he is a really sweet kid. It's good to know he is capable of acting like he is supposed to act--even if that never happens at home. But it is an adjustment living in the house with such a popular child. I guess when he eats ice cream out of the container without permission I have to think twice about reprimanding him. After all, he is "kind of a big deal." Geez....

Gun Slinging City Boys...

Dull isn't a word that I would use to describe my life. While it certainly isn't overly adventurous--I mean we aren't jumping out of planes over here--we don't ever seem to lack for entertainment. Never.

All day yesterday, our house smelled like something died around it. While I was getting dressed to go to a performance at Converse, Josh was investigating the smell. Under the house. In the attic. But no critter. As I am applying my mascara, Ian goes running down the hallway. A minute later, he comes back down the hallway with his BB gun. "Momma--Daddy needs you to get his gun. He has a squirrel cornered in the back yard." Seriously? I look out the window of the bathroom and sure enough, Ian isn't making it up.

Now, if you follow me on Facebook, you may remember that not all that long ago, I woke up very early one morning to my husband stomping through the yard with gun in hand after a squirrel that had escaped the attic. Our house seems to be one part Griswold and another part Swamp People. Ian snaps me back to attention, "Momma, get the gun. We gotta 'choot 'em!"  Okay, maybe a lot Swamp People.

Even though I am semi-complaining now, I do get Josh's gun and take it outside. Ian is poised on the side of the fence, aiming his gun into the shrubs on the side of house. I look over his shoulder and realize he has the squirrel's head in his cross-hairs. I hand Josh his gun as Ian takes a shot. Dead ringer. But the BB at that distance wasn't enough to do more than stun him. The squirrel goes semi-nuts in the shrubs as Josh is trying to locate him to take a shot. Will heads off to the shed to get a net. This has become a family affair.

I am looking in the shrubs for the squirrel, in my dress, BB gun in hand. If I found it, I think I planned to hit it with the gun rather than try to shoot it. Josh, however, beat me to it and finished him off. "Way to 'choot 'em!" cheered Will. "Atta boy!" yelped Ian. These people obviously don't belong in the city. We have got to move them to country.

Squirrel crisis averted, I returned to house to finish getting ready while the boys and Josh did some target shooting with the BB gun. And I will be honest, Ian's gun handling impressed me. Not only was he safe--treating the BB gun as though it were a real gun--but he always used the safety without being reminded. He also was an excellent shot!

I went on to the play while Josh watched the kids. I had a nice time away and when I got home, it was clear that they had enjoyed me being gone. It was 10pm on a school night and they were all still awake, sitting on the kitchen counter, eating cold pizza and watching TV. The boys also had purple Mohawks. Never. a. dull. moment.

Cole, Will & Ian with purple Mohawks.

And that smell? Still here. But, no critter.

A Few Funnies...

Will and his friend Madi were jumping on the trampoline. He is doing flips, handstands, tumbles...you name it. His fearless attitude is almost admirable....if I could stop envisioning the ways in which his fearlessness is going to cost me a fortune in medical bills. Anyway, he is flipping, jumping, etc and says, "Hey mom, watch this..." Famous last words, right? He runs across the trampoline, jumps and does a BACK FLIP. I felt the air leave my body and my stomach jump to my throat. However, instead of seeing him crumpled in a heap with a broken neck, he lands on his feet and shouts, "Now that is what I call WINNING!"

This morning, I dressed in my Mommy uniform--black yoga pants and a tshirt. The tshirt selection was a blue ZTA Bid Day shirt from college. Ian: Mom, do you realize your shirt says "January 2001?" Me: Yes, Ian, I do. Ian: Do you know that means your shirt is over 10 years old? Me: Yes. This is a shirt from college. Ian: Do you realize that you are no longer in college and too old to be wearing shirts from that decade? Me: I realize that this shirt is in excellent condition so I don't care if it's from another decade. Ian: Well I guess its a good thing you are embracing your old age. It will match your hair nicely.

Maggie is learning a lot of new words and animal sounds. Her new favorite word is "sit." Except, it doesn't sound like "Sit" but rather sounds a lot more like "shit." All day, she has been saying "shit, shit, shit." She looked at Will and said, "Shit Wiwie, shit." Will responded, "No Mags, it's S-I-T not shit. Shit is what you do on the potty." I imagine now she has learned TWO new words. Thanks, Will!

Being a "Crazy Crab"

I wish I could say I was one of those moms who was peppy and cheerful and sweet to her children all of the time. I wish I was one of those women who woke up before my family every morning and had a hot, steaming breakfast on the table for everyone when they got up. I wish I was a little more June Cleaver and a little less Peg Bundy.

Dressed as Peg Bundy
Halloween 2009

Seriously. I wish my house were cleaner. I wish I had endless patience. But despite my best efforts, I am not June. Some days, I probably make Peg look desirable as a Mom. I get tired. I get grumpy. And when that happens, my kids see a little a lot of Cruella Deville.

It has been a busy week for me. Add major sinus issues and I feel like I've been run over by a truck a couple of times. This morning, all I really wanted to do was put my pillow over my face and stay in bed. But alas, at 6:30am, Mags whispered "Momma" right into my ear. I pretended I couldn't hear her. She turned up her volume. I still didn't move. She laid there a minute so I thought maybe she was going back to sleep. Instead, she pinched my nose as hard as she could and said, "Beep, Beep!" I was awake.

As soon as my feet touched the floor, I heard Ian bolt out of bed. He had probably been awake for an hour and was patiently waiting for me to get up. He always wakes up early. And he is always peppy. He was ready for breakfast. Do I offer grits and eggs? Pancakes? Nope. Toaster Strudel or cereal? Yes. I know. I am awful. Ian chooses toaster strudel. I open the freezer in the house and realize we are all out. So I have to trudge to the freezer outside to get a new box. I feel my grumpy meter rising to my skull.

After I get the toaster going, I start getting ready for church. While I am always happy about being at church, I am never thrilled about the process it is to actually get to church. I have to pick out clothes for 5 people, dress 5 people, brush the hair and teeth of 4 people. I seem to always be searching for a matching sock or shoe, yelling at kids to keep still so their freshly ironed clothes don't wrinkle before we walk out of the house. It is total chaos and I am anything but a loving, doting mother throughout this process. By the time I get to church, I am literally exhausted and feel like I spend the first 10 minutes repenting for all of the mean, evil, awful, unmotherly ways I acted before I got there. It is me at my very worst.

School mornings are stressful---Josh isn't even here on school mornings---but getting ready for church always seems so much more stressful. I have no idea why. Maybe because he is here? :) In the car this morning driving over, I thought, how on Earth did my grandmother ever get 5 children out the door to church without losing her mind? I can barely manage with 3! But we made it--on time. I took a little power nap this afternoon so getting to church tonight wasn't so painful for everyone. I even cooked dinner before we left. Ian told me as we were walking to the car after church tonight, "Mom, I know you have been a lot grumpy today. Just know that Jesus loves you all the time. Even when you are a crazy crab." And it is that knowledge that helps me get through the day.

Date with Will

I wish there were more hours in the day so that I could spend more time with each of my children individually.

A while back, Ian asked if he and I could start having a date once a month where we do something together, just the two of us. Because we both love books, we typically go to dinner and then to the library. We check out tons of books and then go to the ice cream shop, eat our goodies and read together. We have a chance to talk about stuff that is on his mind. So far, he isn't too old or too cool for this special time and I treasure it!

Each time that Ian and I go on one of our little dates, Will feels left out. I understand that. And although Will and I spend a lot of time together when he gets home from preschool, its rarely that we get time that we don't have to share with Maggie too. I decided it was time for Will to have a date with Mommy too.

Today Will's class was going to the Apple Farm. Blah! I have been to the apple farm every year, at least twice a year since Ian started 4K. I am over it. So I decided that instead of going on the field trip, Will and I would take Maggie to school and then spend a little time together.

He was so excited about our date. There were no arguments over his clothes this morning. I told him he could choose to go anywhere he wanted to go for our date. He said, "First off, I want to take you to breakfast. I am starving. I'll buy but we have to get some grub!" Sounded like a plan to me. I asked him where he would like me to take him. "Mom, let's go to your favorite place to eat breakfast." I really couldn't pinpoint where he was thinking because I don't typically eat breakfast. I said, "Well what is my favorite place?" He looked at me and rolled his eyes, "Well duuuuhhhh. Only the place that serves the best Diet Coke EVER..." McDonald's. I must admit, the child knows me well.

Will ordered. "We will have 2 sausage biscuits, a chocolate milk and the biggest Diet Coke you've got." Not bad. The cashier tells him it will be $4.16. To my astonishment, he pulls out his wallet from his pocket and opens it. He had 1 dollar, which he pulled out to pay for our meal. My heart melted. I am doing a good job raising a gentleman. I told him that I was so grateful he would offer to use his money to buy me breakfast but that it was my treat. "Mom, girls aren't supposed to pay on a date. Just like they aren't supposed to open doors. That is what the boy is for." His Daddy has taught him well. :)

I insisted that I pay, we went outside and enjoyed the spectacular weather. We talked about his friend Zachary, who spent the night for the first time last night. We talked about motorcycles, punchbugs (and of course that he was the KING), Barack Obama, and whether cows really make chocolate milk. Toward the end of our meal, I asked him again what he wanted to do. I thought he might suggest the park or Monkey Joe's. But to my surprise, he asked if we could go to the Library.

And we did. He would read to me (which consists of him looking at the pictures in a book and making up totally ridiculous story lines based on the illustrations), I read to him. In fact, I was doing such a good job animating my stories that by the time we got ready to leave, I had somehow inherited 5 other children, who quietly huddled around my little circle,and listened to me read. For Will, that practically made me famous. He kept saying, "Mom, did you see all those kids listening to you read? You were awesome!" It's amazing how important your children's approval can be sometimes.

Maggie fell asleep on the way home from school so Will and I were able to play with Lego's, read the books we checked out, and snuggle for a while on the couch. Later this afternoon, we jumped on the trampoline together and he laughed hysterically when I peed my pants (All of you who have given birth to children understand my plight. Darn kids ruined my bladder!). We had a fantastic day---AND did not have one argument! It was amazing!

Despite all of his strong personality and stubborn ways, he is a pretty incredible kid. I am so glad he belongs to me. It doesn't hurt that he is pretty darn handsome too!