Punch-bugging Feminists

I have probably been a feminist my entire life. At least as long as I can remember. My parents raised me to believe that my gender wasn't a disability nor should it prevent me from achieving whatever goal I set for myself---and of course, that my mind was just as capable of genius as a man. My Dad made sure Chrissy and I could bait a hook, shoot a gun, drive a stick shift, or change a tire. My Mom raised us to believe in self-reliance, self-sufficiency, and self-respect. From infancy, we were raised to believe that the gateway to all of our dreams was through an education. No one could take it away from us and no matter what, with an education, we wouldn't be forced to rely on anyone for help in life. There is no better confidence booster than knowing that you can provide for yourself.

Obviously, I want Maggie to know that she is entitled to all of the same rights and privileges as her brothers. I want her to demand equal pay for equal work, to never set her sights any lower than the very best in education and to know her value and her worth are defined by her own expectations, not those of others. I think it is very empowering for a girl to grow up with that attitude--the one that my parents so graciously helped to shape for me.

However, if I am doing my part for the empowerment of women, I will do my very best to teach my boys these important lessons. I want all of those those same things for them. But I also want them to believe that  their sister and women like her are entitled to these same basic rights. It will make them better husbands and fathers, classmates, and maybe even bosses, one day.

If only life were as perfect as it is in my head! I really do tell the boys that girls can do the same things that they can do. I provide examples with those degrees and certifications hanging on the wall. And my ability (to Ian's amazement) to drive Josh's truck (which has a stick shift). I am not afraid of frogs or lizards (I proudly hang lizards on my ear lobes like my Uncle Lee always demonstrated when I was a child). Josh and I  show it in our partnership marriage where we both care for the children, clean the house and contribute to the family income. However, I never really know if they get it.

Today I am driving with Will and his friend Madi. Will yells, "Volkswagen Yellow!" I say, "Yes, punch-bug Yellow! Good job Will" (Thanks April for resurrecting this timeless classic). Madi yells out "Punch-bug." Will responds, "You can't say that. I am the KING of punch-bug." (and he really is. The kid can point out a Volkswagen from miles away). So she counters, "Well if you are the King, then I am the princess." Will thinks about it for a minute and counters back, "No, Madi. You can be the King. Girls can do all the same things as boys so if I can be the King, you can too." Ahhh...melting heart moment for me.

I also know that growing up with a sister will reinforce so many of these lessons for the boys. She thinks that she can do all the same things that they do and because they love her so much, they are more than happy to let her tag along. And if ever a boy makes her doubt her self-worth, I am sure Will is more than happy to use these punch-bugging skills on that boy's face.