Dad was typical of his generation--he worked a lot, especially during tomato season. He didn't change diapers, he didn't clean house, I don't ever even really remember him watching us alone. Except for once, when Mom had her tubes tied. I was 5, Chrissy was 7. He took us to the movies (
Anyone who knows him will tell you he is good at two things: hunting and farming. And yes, in that order. As a farmer, I am sure there were times that he wished that he'd had a son. However, he didn't treat our gender as a limitation. We can shoot guns, drive a stick shift, and work on the farm. He wanted Chrissy and I to always dare to dream, to never be afraid to take the chance, believe in ourselves enough to at least try. Failure is a part of life. He raised us to be independent, strong-minded and a little bit stubborn. He encouraged us to go away to college, travel, learn that the world was much bigger than what we could see beyond the mailbox.
I am sure there were times when he regretted teaching us to take chances. When Josh went to ask Dad's permission to marry me, he never really gave him a straight answer. He said something along the lines of "You know her Mom so if you want to take the chance..." After we were engaged I asked Dad why he didn't give Josh a definitive answer. He said, "If I say 'yes' and it doesn't work out, it will be my fault. If I say 'no' then you will just be mad at me. You have to live your own life, Boop. You have to make your own way." But I know in the back of his mind, he was worried. Here I was, just 24 years old and I was going to not only become a wife but also the mother of a toddler. But he never stood in the way of what I wanted and from the moment that he met Ian, he proudly took on the role of Poppa.
As our family has grown, one of the most awesome things for me has been to watch my Dad as Poppa. He is better at this job than any other--even hunting! He was there when Will and Maggie were born, has never missed a birthday party, makes special trips to Grandparent's Day at school or to watch them play ball. I always try to let him off the hook since the drive is long or I know that he is busy. His response is "They only do this once." For his grandchildren, he has his priorities in order. He knows how quickly the time passes. He knows that too soon, they will be all grown up. He knows that each day he gets to spend with them is a gift---his own father didn't live long enough to see his grandchildren. Dad relishes grandparenthood. Hunting and farming have new, exciting meaning when Ian and Will are around. There never was a girl in the world more pretty than his Moo. No matter how tired he is, he will come home from the farm early just to play baseball in the backyard with the kids.
More than ever, I appreciate the fact that he encouraged me to dream; to live my own life; to believe in myself enough to take chances. It was that spirit that led me to become a mom when the entire world wondered if I'd lost my mind. It was that spirit that whispered that the right choice for me was to stay at home with my children when everyone else said that doing so was wasting my talent. It is because he has always been an incredible Dad that I wanted to marry a man who would be just as incredible to my own children. So thank you, Daddy, for being the greatest man I know. Thank you for always believing in my dreams. I hope I can teach my children to pilot their own ships with as much courage and spirit as you have have inspired in Chrissy and me. I love you more than words can say. Love, Your Boop
Dad and Ian on my wedding day, 2006 |
Dad and Will on Chrissy's wedding day, 2010 |
Dad and Maggie on her 1st birthday, 2011 |
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